Tuesday, November 24, 2015


Story. Of. My. Life. I don't know if I'm distracted or if I just have so much damn stuff going on in my head that I forget. Seriously. Just ask my daughter. I don't know how many times we have to turn around when I drive her to school because I can't remember if I closed the garage door. I'm pretty certain at this point she thinks I'm a buffoon. So, I did what every intelligent parent would do. I put her in charge of remembering. Now, by the time we get to the end of the street she reminds me, "Yes mom, you closed the garage door." I don't even have to ask her anymore. Parenting done right people. I'm just waiting until she's tall enough to reach the buttons on the washing machine. Then she gets to do laundry. I've already got the son to clean the toilets. One step closer to freedom. If only CPS wouldn't take issue with me teaching them how to mix the perfect martini. Then I'd have it fucking made people.

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